TIPS & POINTERS

Howya doin’ Daisy Duke. So todolly cool hanging out with you the other day. You are doing a Good Job learning your new role & skills for your New Life. For the most part, JanThurs is todolly happy with your performance.

Allow me to pass along a few Tips & Pointers, Best Practices for Journeydog Guides & Assistants:

Always act like you want to do whatever your Companion tells you to do . . . even if you don’t. Your Companion sometimes sees & knows things & dangers you don’t scents.
And always Come when called. Companions don’t like to be Ignored.
B-( Make sure your Companion carries PooBags. It is discourteous behavior for Companions not to pick up poop after you. You & your mama don’t want to be discourteous Walkers.
Don’t eat Kitty Rocha even if it smells delightful. It gives you bad breath & upset tummy. It can cause your Companion great additional expense (which they don’t like) & you wind up eating Rx Food for a long long time until your tummy straightens out.
B-( If you sense something is wrong, Speak to your Companion. They can ignore you if they want. That’s the way it is . . . unfair, I know. Whattaya gonna do?
If you are Walking On Leash, don’t drag your Walker or run circles around them. Companions are sometimes unsteady on their feet & you don’t wanna cause accidents. Your Role in this regard is Accident Prevention.
B-) When you visit homes & residences such as GrandSire’s domain, always be sure to smile & sniff at the other residents. They mostly love us dogs & it’s good PR. I, myself could use a little brushing up in this area.

I, myself, personally, believe that if you follow these few Tips & Pointers, you’re gonna do OK as a Guide & Assistant. You are still on the uphill side of the Learning Curve. You have good Instincts.

Let’s have another Playdate in the Park soon.
Yr BFF,

OpalK9 OTJ

FWD: TXT MSG TO HONEY

Dear Honey:
We hadda reach out to our cousin, OpalK9, Bloggin’ Dog, in order to contact you on PlanetPluto.com. You were with us so shortly & left so quickly we never had time to know you real well. & now you are gone & we’re sad.

Our Mama, Peach, is sad & devastated & inconsolable. She has a good heart. She just wanted to do the right thing & rescue you from the middle of a busy street in the Valley of Casinos & Bling. Tootsie Roll & Scooter are very sad too. They grew very fond of you in that short time. & #1Son is gonna make sure little dogs can’t slip out again. He’s not too worried about Lily cause she’s pretty big & couldn’t ‘slip’ thru nutthin.

We didn’t even know your name. So we called you Honey cause Peach said you were the color of Honey.

We looked all over for your Forever Family & your Home Domain, but you weren’t chipped. Then you slipped outta our yard & got hit by a passing (too quickly) car. Everybody misses you. I’m sure your Forever Family misses you too.

We want you to be sure to Search for Cali & Puffin cause they are good dogs & know their purpose. They’ll show you the ropes on PlanetPluto. & for Pete’s Sake, get a Twitter account or some way to contact you directly.

Honey, we hardly knew ya!

Yr Sad Friends,
Buddy & Lily & Max

FW: DEAR SANTA

I got comments from . . . Birdie & Bogie (seriously):
Comment from Birdie: Here, here! I just sent a letter to my Oregon Senator asking him to stand up to the NRA bullies and provide us with even basic common sense protections.

Comment from Bogie: I agree, Opal K(. I heard on the news some senators were blaming the non-passage on the NRA. Those who claim that and all those who voted against it should publicly announce their retirement forthwith based on their blatant disregard for their supposed commitment to public service on behalf of we the people which was sacrificed for
votes to feather their own nests. what will it take for we the people to say enough and get rid of the bums altogether

Dear Santa:

I’m re-sending my Xmas Wish List. Not sure what good it will do at this low point for our representation in Congress. We learned yesterday that Congress answers to the highest bidder . . . which in the case of Sensible Gun Legislation means the NRA.

& the NRA & it’s minions in Congress value 2nd Amendment rights to pack lethal weapons for everyone, including violent offenders & mentally unstable with violent tendencies over the 1st Amendment rights of the Post Born to pursue life (which many claim to value even in it’s most unviable stages, but that’s another issue, tho not necessarily unrelated, sort of), liberty & happiness.

Dear Santa, instead of reasonable gun legislation, could you just puh-leez provide those chosen to lead the US, in a unified fashion, with a soul . . . cause the NRA failed to provide them with 1 when they bought those votes.

Still Your Good Dog,

OpalK9 OTJ

Sent: Sun, December 16, 2012 4:57:43 AM

Subject: Re: DEAR SANTA

OH, OpalK9, My family has been and remains so upset by the loss of the little kiddies too….Unbelievable this could happen but you know OpalK9, when humans forget about God, being kind, respectful and just loving each other on a daily basis not just when tragedy comes along what can we expect……You are right, some people are praying for better gun laws, more love and return to the Greatest Generation when good solid morals prevailed but we need more to get on the “right page”….. Our hearts will remain heavy this Christmas season…..Thanks for the thoughtful message and hope you get all your Christmas wishes as you are a special dog and my BFF….Lots of love and hugs from Mom and me to you and our Mymi, Annie

— On Sat, 12/15/12, OpalK9 wrote:

From:
Subject: DEAR SANTA
To:

Date: Saturday, December 15, 2012, 7:57 PM

I been a todolly good dog this whole HY through. Mymi says so & I believe her.

I guided & assisted my family as best I could. I patrolled my community keeping things neat & orderly.

I watch over JanThurs for Puffin during this difficult time for her. I send Puffin txt msg updates.

I sniff out birthdate toys & Christmas presents to be sure everyone gets just the right present. Really tryin’ my best here, Santa!

To be sure you know where to find me I been leavin’ pee-mail msgs along with all the other good & watchful K9s. I paws at all the Christmas decorations to appreciate them & leave my scent. I really like the lambs in the manger scenes. & of course all msgs leave an obvious trail to my domain. I enjoy a roll in the grass on each & every walkies to leave my scent. This Christmas msging is harder than I thought. Santa what’s your txt msg #?

My Christmas List . . .
1. a good bone for a medium size dog. Wrapping not necessary.
2. some peanut butter rawhide chews. I love peanut butter.
3. 1 yr supply of cheese slices. I get 1 every night.
4. a nice new pink collar . . . with sparkly things on it would be nice.
5. & Santa . . . 1 more thing, in memory of Derek & all the humans that have died as a result of senseless gun violence . . . could you bring Americans some common sense & compassion re: reasonable Fire Arm regulation. I know you been busy @ the No Pole & you might notta heard about the latest tragedy where 20 little kiddies about Tootsie Roll & Scooter’s ages were killed by another angry young man with too many guns & a great big grudge. Dear Santa people are praying about this but the msg does not seem to be getting thru. So could you distribute some common sense about the subject. Maybe if it’s all wrapped in a bow humans will open it up & it will seep out into the air like a really good scent.

Dear Santa. That’s all of my list. I’ll be sure to put cookies & milk out for you but you better not come down our chimney cause it’s kinda small & cramped. Merry Christmas to you.

Yrs Truly,
A Very Good Dog

BARF PARTY OF 3

I shoulda known it.  I shoulda seen it coming.  When Mymi kept saying . . .  I’m gonna send you where you can’t scarf up anymore stuff you should NOT scarf up . . . Well I shoulda paid closer attention.  Cause look what happened. 

 

I shoulda known further cause mostly whenever Mymi says . . . wanna go for a ride?  all smiley & the like & then we go get GrandSire.  That usually means I’m going to MySpa & Resort.  Cause that’s where I am presently. 

 

But that’s OK . . . I guess, so Mymi could go to the Valley of Casinos & Bling to visit all the Fam there. 

 

She’s has reported a very exciting day today. 

 

They were going to the Movies.  Tootsie Roll & Scooter wished to see the Croods.  A very exciting historical account of how AnimalPlanet.com came to be in the shape it is today.  They set off in the very large Family Ark.  They were sailing down the freeway when suddenly Tootsie Roll barfed & barfed & barfed. 

 

They hadda pull offa the freeway to the nearest gas station & car wash which they didn’t need a wash on the outside so much as the inside. However that particular establishment didn’t do full service inside auto service.  But they were permitted to use of the resting facility as Tootsie Roll had stuff all over her face & clothes & shoes.  Scooter just held his nose. 

 

Upon cleaning Tootsie Roll as well as possible, they sought refuge in a car wash that specializes interior freshening.  However none were to be found . . . so they returned to Home Base.  Whereupon #1Son squirted & scrubbed, shampooed & scraped things into moveable order once again.  Meantime Tootsie Roll ran under the shower head & changed ensembles like a Red Carpet Diva.  She’s pretty good at that sort of thing.  #1Son also made extra special sure the vehicle is equipped with a Barf Bucket . . . just in case. 

 

& then Team Casinos & Bling returned to the road to locate the movie house so they could review the movie which they had set out to view in the very first place.  Only here in the Valley movin’ pitcher theaters are located inside the Establishments of Casinos & Bling.

 

Everyone ultimately enjoyed the Croods & popcorn & drinks & special spectacles one must wear in order to properly view this particular cinematic wonder.  Animalation it’s called.

 

Btw you (my BFFs & Confidantes) Mymi shoulda seen that 1 comin’.  Tootsie Roll is prone to Car Barfing as I myself am to scarfing down the tastey tidbits & Cat Rocha I find on my Walkies throughout my Community.  She shoulda seen it comin’.  She really shoulda.  OpalK9 OTJ

B Y O B

So like yesterday we had a delightful Walkies.  We took our usual pathway over to the park.  At that point right there is the road construction previously mentioned.  Where they are placing dips in the curbing & Yellow Dots for the Seeing Eye Dogs.  Major construction on our neighborhood streets don’tcha know?

So we took an alternate pathway to GrandSire’s  We pass through more of the domocidal pathways on this route.  We pass lotsa domains.  People work in their driveways & on their lawns & flower beds.  They toss bits of this & scraps of that out for the Trash Man who makes a noisy pathway through our neighborhood not 1x/week but 2x/week.  It’s all pretty exciting when combined with the D9Cats & Cement Trucks of the Work Crews.

Of course I gotta sniff out everything like it’s brand new cause you never know when there will be ever so subtle changes in our surroundings which I as a Self Respecting Offspring of Great Todo & a Conscientious Guide & Assistant should be fully aware of.  Clearly I would not be living up to my duties & responsibilities if I were not cognizant of such changes in my environment.

I found a really todolly Good Find & Righteous Pick on that particular day.  I found a bone.  I tried to hide it from Mymi but Ol’ Eagle Eye spotted it & almost made me Leave It!  I woulda been Righteously Miffed about that but she said it was a Righteous Pick & I carried it all the way to GrandSire’s.  Right through the Lobby of the Receivers.  I waited patiently while Mymi got GrandSire’s mail & chatted with the Lobbyists.

Upon arriving in GrandSire’s domain, I placed my bone very carefully on the floor.  I chewed it up real good.  It had lotsa good tasting marrow & other good things.  I licked up the spillage & tidied up the rug.  & that’s how Polite & Courteous Dogs Bring Your Own Bone.

TAKEN FOR GRANITE

It occurs to me that I have been taking our schedules & routines, activities & routes todolly for Granite lately but NO MORE!  I gotta get sharp & smart, flexible & adaptable if I am to continue in my Role in the Family Circle as the Faithful Companion, Guide & Assistant.

For instance, I’ll tell you what I’m talkin’ about.  There is some road construction occurring in my neighborhood.  Mobility Impaired Access & Seeing Eye Dog Yellow Spots are being installed on our streets . . . to accommodate those with less agility than individuals such as myself, an agile & curious herding dog.  Said accessibility accessories are currently being installed along the park where we pass on the way to GrandSire’s domain.  Todolly changes my focus to get where I’m going.

Or we been super busy lately & our routine has been altered in that sometimes I gotta be flexible & adaptable as to when I get my Walkies & when I hafta remain on vigil in the domain.  Sometimes duty starts early in the AM.  Sometimes it extends well into the darkened hours & past my dinner time.  Gotta be flexible.  I always get my meal . . . eventually.  Told Mymi tho that I’d run away from home if I don’t get my cheese slab & peanut butter rawhide bone.  (FYI I wouldn’t really but a dog’s gotta have some boundaries).

& so it is that I was somewhat unprepared in the flexibility & adaptability department for the surprise (to me) visit from my UncaT & AuntieTeach.  I was sure surprised & happy to see them.  I barked & yipped & ran around the car 3 times.  They arrived late at night & then they all went to sleep.

They took GrandSire for a ride down the River & before anyone knew they were at the Bay Bridge.  So they went over the Bridge, ate dinner, took pictures & videos of the Light Show on the Bridge.  & then they thought to return to our domain & get me some dinner.  GrandSire todolly enjoyed the adventure so that turned out OK & I just hadda cool my jets & be patient.  I did my job tho.  I know my purpose.

The next day, they all went to the Aerospace Museum in our town.  That’s a place that’s loaded with old military aircraft & new modern(ish) space exploration stuff.  Beings as how I already been to the NASA Space Center, this turn of events was not todolly overwhelming for me. GrandSire enjoyed seeing some of the old & historical aircraft that helped win WWII.  He enjoyed discussions with the people who love airplanes & flight & love to share their knowledge & experience.  He liked the Aerospace Museum greatly.

Today I finally got my chance to shine in my role of Companion, Guide & Assistant when we hadda take UncaT & AuntieTeach to the International Airport so they could return eastward.  I know all about that stuff.  I hadda ride shotgun just in case they got lost & wound up on the Bay Bridge again.  UncaT & AuntieTeach woulda never made their flight.  & 1 other thing I know is you’re never eVer late for a flight departure or a tee time.  So I’m learning…

So I’m working on my Flexibility & Adaptability Skills.  Nothing is cast in stone & I am not gonna take our routines & schedules for Granite anymore.   Lotsa pix were taken & I’m attaching a few.
palK9 OTJ

SEECASTRAYSHUN

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I know.  I know.  I’m just a dog.  US dogs shouldn’t be concerned with long words or complex human issues like SeeCaStrayShun.  After all what can simple minded dogs contribute to the conversation?

SeeCaStrayShun is a pretty long word & seems pretty complex & like it’s completely & todolly unsolveable when all the humans are running around with their fur on fire, digging mole hills into mountains & todolly unable to wrap their paws around a resolution.  & they got opposeable thumbs.  What’s a dog to do?

Sometimes the it’s best to step back & sit a spell.  Shake the fleas off the issue.  So us dogs been tweeting & instagramming & stuff like that.  Forming Commissions & Blue Ribbon Panels to help humans outta this self-imposed hole they dug for themselves.  Who knows more about digging holes than your dog? 

The answer to this divisive question is obvious to those of us with enough common K9 Sense to wag your tail when you’re happy.  US dogs think, & this is merely a suggestion mind you, that the whole US budget oughta be handed to the Department of Defense.

    The DOD knows how to allocate resources & reassess when things seem to need adjustment.
    The DOD seems to appreciate the value of an educated, healthy & well-trained labor force.
    The DOD wants to make good on the promises made to those who have served altho it would seem the DOD needs a little more practice in this area to get it right.
    The DOD understands you have to invest in yourself if you want to progress so they are willing to repair roads & bridges, fill potholes & expand current capacities (to move military equipment around, you know).
     The military gets that new capacities & innovation will keep us ahead of the pack & retain our leadership role around AnimalPlanet.com.

So US dogs feel it’s a win/win situation.  Accept or reject.  You are welcome.  US dogs are here to help.

palK9 OTJ